You know they say Hitler was impeccably neat.
Way to perpetuate ethnic stereotypes there.
I’ll be in room listening to David Hasselhoff on my headphones if you need to bitch about something else.
You think this kitchen’s dirty, you should see German porn.
Would you like some cheese with that whine? That is German custom no? Oh French? You all look all the same to me.
Sounds like someone needs to watch the Sound of Music again.
You wouldn’t last long on a U-boat
Well I want you to don a lederhosen and sing Rammstein, we don’t all get what we want.
There’s a better way to let that anger out than writing notes on the kitchen door, no?
Sorry, I did nazi those dishes over there
German beer is so much better than American beer, after only 4 or 5 you’re nearly attractive enough to cancel out your personality.
Perhaps you would like to taste my sauerkraut?
Choke on a Danish bitch.
In what was widely seen as evidence of his move toward the political center, Barack Obama claimed Monday to have “personally tortured insurgents” at Camp Guantanamo. After his National Security credentials were questioned by leading Republicans, Obama responded that, “McCain may support Guantanamo, but has he held an Arab underwater until he stops thrashing? Has he casually extinguished cigarettes on their eternally damned skin? Has he turned up the Michael Bolton music at their most vulnerable moment?” He went on to say that he would “enact strong legislation” to expand the scope and breadth of activities at the U.S. base. “Romney says he’ll double Guantanamo’s size? I will triple Guantanamo! I will depose Castro and make the entire nation a
The Justice Department warned the nation today of potentially severe rises in munchie prices, which it attributed to the population of marijuana smokers. According the Attorney General, “I know some out there would say that this is a victimless crime, but those are people who have not bought a Crunch Wrap Supreme recently.” He also advised the public not to take the threat lightly, due to “the wide ranging effects this could have on small-town
Leading home-school advocates are making a concerted effort this year to end what they see as unfair stereotypes about their movement, especially the idea that home-schoolers do not receive the socialization necessary to function in society. In the words of young home-schooler Malachi Justice “we really are just as socialized as the public-schoolers, to within 3 standard deviations, we just avoid partaking of the Godless fornication and brainwashing which occurs in those schools.” Home-school demigod Michael Farris agrees, “these kids go the same Christian Soldier™ Camps, churn the same butter, memorize the same scriptures, and wear the same chastity shorts that any normal red-blooded American kid does, we’re not freaks.” Others point to the wide variety of social options available to kids within their home-schooling groups, including Bible Bowls, Math teams, Fight the good Fight clubs, and knitting networks. Home-schoolers insist that they will not take the abuse anymore. As young Malachi exclaimed, “If I hear one more generalization about home-schoolers, well heck, I reckon I’ll go Robert E. Lee on them.
So the administration has lately been trying to stoke fear about Iran, in a rather inept fashion, (remember the days when they could stoke fear with the best of them?). But if I had to guess, I’m betting what’s really making the neo-cons antsy is a nation much closer to home. Venezuela. Well, add Bolivia, Ecuador, Brazil, Nicaragua, Uruguay. Nation after nation in South America is casting out oppressive governments and the entrenched elites which have dominated for hundreds of years. They are rejecting the neo-liberal, free-market (for some) ideologies which have bankrupted their countries and thrown millions into poverty. They are electing men and women of humble origins, and instituting policies actually supported by the people (one day America). And for the first time in recent American history, there’s absolutely nothing the U.S. can do about it.
For the last hundred years, South America has mostly followed the same general pattern. Business interests in the States have worked with the mostly hereditary upper classes in these nations at the expense of the working classes. In exchange for the military and political support of the U.S., these leaders generally followed the geopolitical directives of our country, and provided U.S. businesses with numerous tax breaks and incentives, promising not to interfere with their desire to exploit the cheap labor of their nation with any “red tape.”
This process accelerated in the 1970s and 80s, as western nations began to push “neo-liberal” economic principles. The label neo-liberal is misleading and refers to what we think of as conservative “classically liberal (yeah it makes no sense)” economics, including free-trade, deregulation, privatization, etc. Multinational corporations, along with the International Monetary Fund, pressured Latin American leaders to drastically cut public expenditures on health care, transportation, and education, among other things, and create a deregulated business environment for the benefit of global businesses. So while much of the population plunged into poverty, and was denied any access to social services, multinationals rushed in to take advantage of rock-bottom labor prices, low taxes and no oversight. Since regulations concerning capital flight had also been eliminated (those cumbersome regulations!) corporations were then allowed to leave the country when other opportunities presented themselves, taking the nations assets with them and leaving behind a brutally raped and pillaged economy. These corporations could also play countries against each other, making it impossible for unions to from and resist.
But unlike the U.S. where the wrath of the working classes has been easily diverted toward homosexuals, Muslims and Mexicans, South America decided to resist. In 1998 Venezuelans elected Hugo Chavez, the son of two school-teachers born in the poor rural regions of the country. In nine years, Chavez has altered the country, taking the oil wealth and investing in neighborhoods and towns which had been ignored for decades. He nationalized the oil company, and profits now go to schools, rural doctors and housing.
And while U.S. media has largely portrayed this spending as Chavez buying the support of the poor while consolidating power, Chavez has actually put power in the hands of the people themselves. One of the first actions of the government was a campaign to battle illiteracy, which has now been largely eliminated. A new constitution was written with input coming from the people themselves. The illiterate were taught how to read the constitution and people across the nation were informed of their rights versus the government. Community organizations were formed and grants from the government were given directly to local communities, which prevented corruption and allowed the people in a given neighborhood to decide what their most pressing needs were. Poverty has been severely reduced, and Chavez is now working with other nations around the area. For example, the country sends oil to Cuba in exchange for doctors, who are opening free clinics in the Venezuelan countryside (can you really imagine the U.S. using its oil profits in this way?) The military was sent across the country to help with infrastructure problems, such as construction or the repair of a fishing vessel. Here are some summaries of what’s happening.
http://video.google.com/videoplay?docid=368302323300507208 No Volveran documentary, clearly from a certain point of view, but does a good job explaining the
programs instituted
http://video.google.com/videoplay?docid=5832390545689805144
http://thetake.org/index.cfm?page_name=synopsis
Of course naturally, the U.S. quickly began to take notice…
I have heard so many warnings of the peril of "Islamo-fascism" and the threat it poses to Western Civilization, that I have decided to undertake a comparative study of both conservative Christians and their Islamist foes. Here are my findings.
Differences between an “Islamo-fascist” and a fundamentalist Christian
Islamo-fascists believe that they are acting according to the will of God based on the revelation contained in their holy book, which was divinely inspired. They maintain that, when in conflict, empirical evidence and logic must be subordinated to their interpretation of this work. Fundamentalist Christians, on the other hand, are centered predominantly in the U.S.
Islamo-fascists believe that those who disagree with them are going to hell, and are not merely honest proponents of another opinion, but are enemies of the faith and agents of the devil. Fundamentalist Christians enjoy football.
Islamo-fascists believe that their nations should be ruled by the law of Allah, and it is their duty to take back the government for their Lord, and reflect the moral teaching of their religion with their governance. Fundamentalist Christians eat pork.
Islamo-fascists repress their women, and teach that their proper place is the home, away from the corrupting influence of the public sphere, politics and education. Fundamentalist Christians allow their women to repress themselves.
Islamo-fascists are obsessed with sex, virginity and purity, and impose this highly unhealthy fixation on others. This leads to all sorts of hypocrisy, such as temporary marriages. Fundamentalist Christians have high speed internet.
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